First things first - Happy New Year!
Entering a new year (and decade) means that we’re not taking any chances – we’re ready to relentlessly chase the stress-free life we want so bad and we’ll stop at nothing until we get it. So, naturally, we’ve decided to leave a lot of unnecessary and exhausting sh*t behind.
So, here’s 10 things we can’t wait to leave behind in 2019…
We’re not emotionally prepared to hear another thing about Brexit – we’ve HAD IT. It’s out of our hands and we’d much rather sip our tea in peace, free from political debates 24/7.
2. OVERUSED MEMES
Sweet and angelic Baby Yoda, you can stay.
Pretty much all of the others that keep cropping up from the early 2000’s, it’s time to go. We’re so ready for a meme overhaul and this is the year for it – we can feel it in our bones.
3. TOXIC ONLINE PRESENCE
A love letter to all the YouTubers who thrive off drama: goodbye.
If you love the tea too much to actually be a half decent person, you’re out. Along with the crazy cancelling online communities, online trolls, body shamers and pretty much every weirdo who uses social media in a negative way. Sorry not sorry.
4. OLD TOWN ROAD
We’re really sorry Lil Nas and Billy Ray Cyrus, but this song has got to go. It’s become 2019’s version of 2010’s Moves Like Jagger = overplayed, and our poor fragile ears just can’t take it anymore.
It’s 2020 people, just make use of the close friends feature on Instagram and give this weird fad a rest. Finsta’s have had their time, and no one cares anymore. More importantly – who has the time to run two accounts?
6. SUGAR AND CALORIE POLICE
We’re looking at Jamie Oliver the same way Drake and Josh look at Megan.
Can’t a gal eat a Krispy Kreme without being reminded that it takes an hour to walk it off? We’re all here for a healthy lifestyle and clean January, but let a girl live.
Yeet just isn’t a vibe. It never has been, and it never will be. Stop trying to make it happen.
We propose that we bring back Paris Hilton’s ‘that’s hot’ or Gretchen Wiener’s ‘fetch’ instead, but we’re open to suggestions.
Oral health first, but we’re actually talking about the dance.
This dance first haunted us in 2017, where backpack kid in Katy Perry’s Swish video made us all go wild for it. It’s now 2020, and it’s time to give it a rest.
9. BAD FOOD HABITS
A little bit of self-awareness at the dinner table goes a long way…
There’s no time to ignore that person who eats with their mouth wide open, leaves toast crumbs in the butter or coughs all over the food *vom*.
10. DODGY FAKE TAN
Stay moisturised boys and girls.
There’s no excuse anymore – we’re all pretty well versed in the world of fake tan now, right? Most of us have waved goodbye to the sun beds, so it’s time to talk business: if you’re not exfoliating and moisturising beforehand, you’re only disappointing yourself.
What are you leaving behind in 2019?